Russell - A Match Made in Heaven

A MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN

“The discovery of nuclear reactions need not bring about the destruction of mankind any more than the discovery of matches”

- Albert Einstein

Russell hadn't been happy since he and Ruth moved to Los Alamos.  He had taken the security guard position with the Labs when he dropped out of New Mexico State University.  Hell, the only reason New Mexico State had accepted him was because they needed a good running back.  None of the Texas schools would have him because of his grades.  Two years into the program he broke his ankle and never returned to the field.  Ruth encouraged him to get a job in law enforcement which he had talked about off and on since he started college.  Russell had a solid D+ average when he quit college and went through the training program to become a security guard.  Ruth with an A- average quit school to be with him and they moved to Los Alamos against the wishes of both sets of parents.  Three months after the move to LA, Ruth was pregnant with their second child.

They were living in an efficiency trying to pay off their combined student loans and get by on the first year salary of a security guard while living in one of the wealthiest counties in the Nation.  How Ruth how decided to get pregnant at this point Russell had no idea.  All he knew is that they already had a 3 year old boy and couldn't afford another baby.  Everyday when Russell got home from work at 8:30 am, Jack would run up and grab his leg and Ruth wanted to talk to him about how the baby was feeling and wouldn't it be great to have one.   

Ruth would say, "Honey, give me your hand.  He just kicked."

A lot of time before Russell would go on shift he would go to the Los Alamos Golf Club Bar which was frequented by the alcoholics in town.  That's where he met his one friend in town, Max Black, who built houses for the coneheads.   Max was a true redneck.  He was six foot four inches tall with a massive chest, big red beard, unkempt straggly hair, huge stomach hanging over a rodeo buckle that he got when he was fourteen, and a baseball cap that said Russell Tractor.

Russell leaned over the bar to order a drink just to the left of Max.  Max turned slightly wondering who was ordering next to him when there was a whole bar to choose from.  That's when Max noticed the Russell Tractor hat and said, "Hey, yur hat has ma name on it. Wanna a beer."  

Max looked Russell over.  He was about his height, two hundred and forty five pounds, pretty solid with a beer belly.  Looked like a running back.  Probably born and raised in Texas.  Max looked at the bartender and said, "Hey Mickey, this guy is gonna buy me your a Coors draft."  He was new to town but there wasn't a bartender in town that didn't worry when he came into the bar.  These two guys together were nothing but trouble.

"So, where did you play ball?" Max asked.  

"NMSU.  How did you know? said Russell.

"A lucky guess.  I played for UNM.  Defensive Tackle.  So you're from Texas."  Max said.

"Odessa. Where the men are men and the sheep are scarred."  Russell said.

Max laughed, "You married?"

"Ya, but it ain't goin' lok it should. She got herself pregnant and we ain't got no money."

Max looked at his new friend, "Yeah, fucking women.  How do you like these coneheads up here?"

"All I cun do to keep from kickin' thar ass ever day." said Russell.

A match made in heaven.  Both were ex football players.  Both were prejudiced rednecks that found everything wrong with anyone that was different than themselves.  They were the same age, but mostly, they were mean and nasty.

---

Copyright © 1993 - 2010 Philip Regenie, All Rights Reserved